I don’t know
for how long I sat there like statue. I was crying on and on till my heart’s
content.. After some time I collected my phone parts and put it together. Gita
called me. Before she could start I asked, ‘Gita can you come to beach now? .’
She said ok and asked me to wait for ten mins.
She came and
picked me. She asked permission from my mom to stay wit her tonight as this is
my last night in Chennai. Mom also agreed for that. Gita told me to sit in her
room and brought dinner for me. When she sat near me I lied on her lap and
started to cry. I explained her everything. She switched off my mobile and
consoled me but nothing fell in to my ears. She called Arjun and Arun to her
home. I asked not to call them because they were angry on me and on Gautham
because I didn't talk with them properly after Gautham entered in my life. After
some time they too came, scolded me and him. Asked me to forgot everything
regarding him. What ever they say only his last words was ringing in to my ears
“At least be true to him.”
As early
morning was the train I went to home. All came with me for send off but truly
for my support. We got train. I was standing down with my friends they kept on
saying to forget him but my eyes were searching for him out of my control. I
know he wont show up and that was the last moment I waited for him…..
Mysore, the
city for festivals. New home, new place and new people but nothing changed my
past. I said everything to my mom in train itself as she saw me crying. But didn't mention his name. She told me to cut all my friends contacts. I too felt
that it will help me to recover from this. I threw away my sim card when I left
Chennai. My room was filled with my unopened luggage. To eat only I used to go
out of my room but sometime I would skip that also and pretend like I was
sleeping. All my sleepless nights filled with tears. If I sleep also I would
get nightmares and will wake up. No phone calls and msgs to attend. Mom said to
dad that I was worrying about my friends as I came away from them.She spoke
with me often and tried to get out of this. But nothing helped me. I used to
sit near the window and stare for the whole day.
My love on
him slowly turned into hatred. My mom cared me more than before. If she had
cared me like this from my childhood I wouldn't have felt loneliness and
searched for love and I would not be like this. Whoever does the mistake, I was
the sufferer. My health condition became poorer. I became anemic, to walk also
I needed my mom’s help. Doctor told me to take only liquid food. His thoughts
was killing me. My dad started to scold my mom as I was like this. Each day
fight between them increased. Mom worried about me a lot.
Soon I
started realizing that nothing will change by thinking about him.
“Why should
i feel for him? My beautiful life is ruined now because of him. Not only mine
but my parents happiness also gone. I was giving pain to my parents
only. But he
will think that I am living a happy life with Sanjay. Four years I was with him
but he didn't believe me even a bit. In-front of strangers he talked bad about
my character. He didn't turn up also after that moment. But I am only suffering
here. I started hate him like anything. I feel irritated if I see things which
made me to think about him. My parents are with me and they are enough.”I
decided.
I got call
letter from the company which I got selected by campus interview. They gave
work place as Chennai and joining date after one and half month.
One month
passed, my health condition improved little bit. I started to talk with my
parents like before at-least for their happiness. In these days I never tried to call anyone even to Gita. I want to forget everything. I packed my things and
went to Chennai again. I didn't make any contact with my friends.
But one day,
Gautham came to my office to see me. I don’t want to see him also. He was
waiting in reception. I called to reception and asked to give the phone to him.
'Hello
Harini '
‘Please I
don’t want to talk with you. If you want me to live just go out of this place.
I never want to see you again Gautham.I hate you the most.Bye.’ I cut the
phone.
I don’t want
to be in that office anymore. I know about him, he will surely come back. On
that day itself I went back to my home. I gave medical certificate that I have back pain and cant work. I resigned my job. The job for which I worked for four
years.
I searched
for job in Mysore. After two months I got job, but in Delhi. Where ever it is I
want to go. I cant sit here simply. I convinced my parents.
In Delhi, I
stayed in working women hostel. I concentrated on my work only. If I feel bored
I used to go out alone. Whenever I get his thought only his last words come to
my mind. I didn't make any friendship with anyone.I worked there for two years.
Sometime I search for my phone to call my parents, the cell phone which once I
never kept down.My dad was busy searching bridegroom for me. I rejected
everyone. After a long fight ,my dad asked me to marry one person.That also I
accepted for my parents’s wish. As I was not interested in that I didn't ask
about that person anything and that is Gautham…………………
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